So, I’m currently typing this with gloves on….no joke.  They are purple and pink, and have princess crowns on them.  Pretty sure my parents gave them to me as a gag gift stocking stuffer a couple of years ago.  My hands are SO FREAKING cold!!!  Actually, all of me is cold, and I can’t seem to get warm.  Tonight is definitely going to be a night where I sleep in long pants and long sleeves……which is EXTREMELY rare for me and probably means I’m dying.  And as far as the gloves go, well, they were closest thing at hand (no pun intended).  They were already out, since little brother wore them to shovel the driveway  when it snowed last.  He’s secure in himself and will rock some sweet princess gloves whenever he feels like it.

Speaking of little brother, he made the comment that I need to work on my food photos.  Duh.  I know this.  I never claimed to be a food photographer.  In fact, much of what you see on this page is pics that I snap of my food immediately prior to me stuffing my face with it!  Which also accounts for some ridiculously sized portions….don’t judge.  Sometimes, a girl just needs to smash.  Got it?  But nevertheless, my most sincere apologize for my crappy food pics.  I’ll work on it….eventually.  Promise!

The recipes I’m posting tonight are kind of a “choose your own adventure” dinner.  I started off by being super lazy and making the chicken in the crockpot, with the intention of making tacos.  Then I got home Monday night, said screw it, and cooked up some cauliflower rice….and BOOM!  The burrito bowl was born.  Skip to tonight were I was feeling lazy again….so I stuffed the leftovers into peppers and just popped them in the oven.  Easy eats are the tastiest kind!!  So here they are.  Eat them all together, make them separately, do whatever your heart desires! Just get down with your paleo self.

Crockpot Spicy Pulled Chicken

• 2 pounds frozen chicken (I used all breast meat, but you could use thighs as well, or a combo)
• 2 cups prepared salsa (use a brand without a bunch of extra crap in it, or make your own….choose your heat level to suit your tastes)
• 2 small cans diced green chiles (do not drain these!)
• 1 jalapeno, seeds and ribs removed, diced
• 1 tablespoon chili powder
• 1 teaspoon cumin
• 1 teaspoon dried cilantro
• 1 teaspoon onion powder
• 1 teaspoon garlic powder

1. Place frozen chicken in crockpot.
2. Cover chicken with all remaining ingredients.
3. Set your crockpot to LOW and cook for 8 hours. Mine went for 8 hours, then I had little brother turn it to WARM when he got home….and it was on that setting for another 2 hours.
4. Shred chicken with a fork!

Cilantro Lime Cauliflower Rice

• 2 smallish heads of cauliflower
• 1 small yellow onion, diced
• 4 cloves garlic, minced
• 1 bunch fresh cilantro
• 2 limes
• Salt to taste

1. Using the chopping blade on a food processor (or you could grate it by hand, but that would SUCK hardcore) in small batches, add your cauliflower and pulse it until it looks like grains of rice.  I had to do this in about 4 batches.  No worries. I just dumped it all into a big bowl until I had pulverized all of it!
2. In a deep skillet, heat 2 tablespoons of coconut oil over medium high heat.
3. Saute onions and garlic until they begin to get a bit of color and start to soften….about 5 minutes.
4. Add in your “rice” and stir it around in the onions, garlic, and oil.  It’s cool if your pan seems over-loaded, it actually helps to create some steam.  Continue to stir it every couple of minutes until the rice begins to soften up a bit and gets to a texture that you like for cooked rice.  Mine went for about 7 minutes or so.
5. Squeeze the juice of your limes over your rice and toss in the chopped cilantro.  Continue to cook with these ingredients for another 5 minutes.
6. EAT!

To make the burrito bowl:

1. Serve up some rice in a bowl.
2. Top it with some of your chicken.
3. For toppings, I added some more salsa, some chopped lettuce, some Sriracha, some cilantro, and some avocado…DUH.
4. Mix it all up until it’s just a mess of delicious food and SMASH!  Relish in how awesome your cooking abilities are, and how that “chain restaurant” that offers a similar burrito bowl, ain’t got NOTHING on you!

To make the stuffed peppers:

1. Preheat your oven to 375 degrees.
2. Cut the tops off of 4 green peppers, and pull out all seeds and ribs, but leaving the pepper in tact as a cup.
3. Stuff each pepper about half way full of your leftover rice.
4. Top each pepper with your leftover pulled chicken.
5. Arrange in a glass baking dish.
6. Put about 1/2 inch of water in the bottom of your dish to create some steam while cooking.
7. Bake for 30-35 minutes (or until peppers are cooked to desired done-ness….I like mine on the crunchier side, so I actually pull mine out at about 25 minutes)
8. Top with whatever toppings you choose!  I used the same ones I topped my burrito bowls with.

Hopefully this gives some options to play around with!  It was all STUPIDLY easy, and aided in my general laziness.  Tomorrow I’m going to get all sorts of crazy and wrap some brussels sprouts in bacon….so you just wait!  Sending warm, princess glove, chamomile tea drinking love your way!

-Meister

A couple of major events transpired this weekend:

1. We got to demo the CRAP out of the new gym space!  Took down some walls….which mostly meant I stood around and watched dudes work!  It also means I got to play with powertools…..OH YEAH!!! Anyways, I baked for the folks working. Duh! That’s what I do!  When all was said and done, the new space is completely opened up, and the possibilities are truly endless!!  And look, here’s proof that I actually did some work…..oh who am I kidding, I can’t be serious about anything.

2.  Miss Olivia had her going away party.  It was a completely wonderful send off to quite possibly one of the most BAD ASS chicks I’ve ever met.  I’m super sad to see her go but am completely confident she will continue to be a BAMF in the next chapter of her life.  Hip Hop Fridays won’t be the same without her 😦  Here is a vanity shot of some of the foxiest ladies at the party…..oh wait!  Who is the creeper with devil eyes in the middle? Hmm….why do my eyes ALWAYS do that!?!?! Ugh.

3.  I did absolutely NOTHING for the remainder of the weekend.  Staying out, dancing like a fool, and having just a couple of drinks totally took it out of me.  Add in the fact that I think I might be getting sick, and BOOM!  You’ve got a perfect storm that amounts to me doing NOTHING all Sunday!

Looking at the calendar for this week kind of scares me….I have nothing on my school calendar, and nothing on my personal calendar.  Why does this scare me?  Because I can’t honestly believe that I will have a week of nothing.  When these weeks usually come around, something manages to EXPLODE! Tame just doesn’t exist in my world.  I’m trying to trust that perhaps the universe has left this week open for me because the good Lord knows that I’m going to be needed to support those nearest and dearest to me.  Lots going on in the lives of those closest to me, so I’m doing my best to put as much positivity out there as I can!!

OK, onto food!  So, I made this cioppino last Thursday.  I’m trying to be a good part-time Catholic and observe not eating meat on Fridays during Lent.  This stew is freaking AMAZING!! It’s slightly spicy and totally delicious.  Typically, the best part of cioppino is dipping some crusty bread into the tomato broth, but yeah, that obviously didn’t happen!  I made some plantain chips to go with it though, and those were BOMB!!

Quick Cioppino with Plantain Chips

To make the Plantain Chips:

• 2 large, slightly ripe (light yellow in color) plantains
• Coconut oil, for brushing
• Salt (or any other spices you might want to use)

1. Preheat your oven to 400 degrees.
2. Line a baking sheet with parchment paper.  Brush the parchment paper with a thin coating of coconut oil. (I know this seems counter-intuitive….just do it. Trust me.)
3. Peel your plantains. I have found it easiest to cut off both ends, then slit through the peel lengthwise.  Use your thumb to separate the peel from the plantain.
4. Thinly slice your plantains.  Think slightly thicker than a quarter…about as thick as a half dollar.  The important thing is to try to get them all the same thickness.
5. Arrange the slices on your baking sheet and brush the tops of them with some more coconut oil.
6. Sprinkle with salt.
7. Bake for 10 minutes at 400 degrees.
8. Flip them after 10 minutes, then bake for another 7-8 minutes.
9. Remove them from the oven and let them cool.  They get crispier as they cool.
10. Stuff your face!  They are SUPER addictive.  I don’t ever have any leftovers….

To make the Cioppino:

• 1 medium red onion, diced
• 2 green bell peppers, diced
• 4 cloves garlic, minced
• 25 oz. jar of marinara sauce (get the good stuff without all of the added CRAP in it!  Or just use about 25 ounces of tomato sauce)
• 8 oz. bottle of clam juice (totally gross to think about, but it makes it SO GOOD!)
• 1 cup vegetable stock (you could use chicken stock, but I was trying to keep it meat free)
• Pinch of red pepper flakes
• 1/2 teaspoon dried basil
• 4 sprigs of fresh thyme (remove the tiny little leaves from the stems)
• 1/2 teaspoon dried oregano
• 1 bunch fresh flat leaf parsley
• 2 pounds of seafood (Use whatever floats your boat.  I used 2 packages of Trader Joe’s Seafood Blend from the freezer case.  Use a mix of chopped white fish, shrimp, scallops, calamari, whatever you’ve got!  Fresh or frozen, doesn’t really matter)

1. In a large soup pot, add in your veggies (onion, bell pepper, and garlic) and saute until they are translucent, about 5 minutes.
2. Stir in the marinara, clam juice, veggie stock, red pepper flakes, dried herbs, and thyme.  Simmer on medium low heat for about 10 minutes.
3. Add in your seafood.  Continue to simmer until seafood is cooked through.  Cooking time will depend on whether you are using precooked/frozen vs. fresh seafood.  I let mine simmer for about 15 minutes, just for good measure.
4. Stir in half of your fresh parsley.
5. Serve it up in big bowls.  Top with more fresh parsley and some of those crispy plantain chips!
6. Enjoy the briny, tomato-y goodness!!!

I shared this with one of my girls from the gym, Ava.  She totally dug it.  Pretty sure you will too!  She’s awesome, and you want to be like her…..so make this!  Sending much love and positivity!

-Meister