Tag Archives: Primal

Chicken Bacon Deliciousness…..aka Eating your Feelings

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chicken bacon mac

Hello friends!!  The past couple of weeks have been spent settling into a routine of sorts.  Basically, that means I’ve been doing nothing but reading and going to the gym.  My apartment is impeccably clean, my laundry is always done, and I’m getting into incredibly bizarre eating patterns.  I spent a good week drinking copious amounts of wine and exploring the outdoors.  Headed to Austin last weekend, and believe it or not, yours truly, Queen of Clumsy, hung out in a hammock!  Now, I don’t mean the kind that you gently just sit into.  This one involved a small bit of climbing and WHOLE lot of trust in both my own balance and weight distribution, as well as the sweet rigging skills of my companion.  In the end, there was minimal squealing, a bit of “NOPE! Not doing that!”, and whole lot of self-doubt, and one solid dose of “Suck it up Meister!”.  I owned that hammock.  Enjoyed it immensely, and then had the most UNgraceful dismount out of it that included hugging a tree, therefore scraping and bruising the crap out of my entire left arm.  Good times. No, GREAT times!

Anyways, I’ve been suffering a mild trip-hangover after returning from Austin, so I’ve been just kind of eating whatever is accessible…..until I ran out of food.  Needless to say, I’ve been wanting to eat all of the feelings.  By now, if you’ve read more than two of my posts, I’m sure you’ve figured out that “eating my feelings” = COMFORT FOOD!!

I made this insanely delicious Chicken Bacon “Mac and Cheese”.  While this isn’t technically Paleo (because it includes some grassfed/raw cheese) you could leave the cheese out and it would still be plenty delicious.  If you can’t get down with dairy, just omit it.  I won’t be offended. 🙂

Chicken Bacon Mac & Cheese

  • 1 medium spaghetti squash
  • 1.5 pounds chicken breast, cut into small chunks
  • 5-6 slices thick cut bacon, cut into small pieces
  • 1 can full fat coconut milk, make sure it’s at room temperature
  • 1 heaping tablespoon tapioca starch
  • 6-7 oz. grassfed or raw cheddar cheese, shredded
  • 1 teaspoon garlic powder
  • 1 teaspoon onion powder
  • 1 teaspoon salt
  • 1/2 teaspoon pepper
  • Optional toppings: crushed chicharonnes (pork rinds), scallions, fresh parsley, whatever your heart desires
  1. Preheat your oven to 400 degrees.  Cut your spaghetti squash lengthwise, scoop out the seeds, place facedown on a cookie sheet and bake for 20-30 minutes (or until the outer skin gives a bit when you press on it).
  2. Set cooked squash aside to cool while you prepare your sauce.
  3. In a deep skillet, heat a small amount of oil over medium-high heat and add your diced chicken.  Cook chicken until it is browned and cooked through, about 7-10 minutes. Remove chicken from skillet…..I just put mine on a plate to hang out until I needed it again.
  4. Add your diced bacon to the skillet.  Cook bacon until it is crisp, about 5-7 minutes.  Remove bacon from skillet.  You want to leave about 2 tablespoons of bacon fat in the bottom of your skillet.  If your bacon gave off a ton of grease, pour out some of it.  You want just enough to cover the entire bottom of the skillet.
  5. Reduce your heat to medium low.  Whisk your tapioca starch into your bacon grease until it is fully incorporated.
  6. Add your can of coconut milk to the skillet.  You will want to whisk pretty continuously until it is all fully incorporated.  You will notice that it will thicken pretty quickly, thanks to the tapioca starch!
  7. At this point, whisk your cheese into the sauce until it is fully incorporated and melted.  Also add in your spices.
  8. TASTE!  Now is the time to taste your sauce and adjust accordingly.  ***If you do not add the cheese, you’ll want to bump up your spices some***
  9. Mix back in your cooked chicken breast and bacon.
  10. Shred your spaghetti squash into the pan and mix ALL of the goodness together, making sure everything is coated in cheesy deliciousness!
  11. Pour everything into a rectangular baking dish (I used an awkward sized one, but a 9×13 would work great) and top with whatever toppings you choose…..or none at all!
  12. Bake at 350 for 20 minutes or until it is all bubbly and golden around the edges.
  13. Remove from the oven and let cool for about 5 minutes before smashing it into your face.  Trust me, the roof of your mouth will hate you otherwise.

Word to the wise, this makes a LOT of food.  Pace yourself on it, because it’s pretty rich and decadent.  WORTH IT!!!  In the mean time, get outside, breath some fresh air, test your limits, and scare the hell out of yourself.  The feeling of accomplishment afterwards is WELL worth the freak out during.

Peace, Love, and Paleo!

-Meister

Creating a Home and Smashing on Stroganoff.

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Hello friends! I’ve officially been a Texas resident for all of 13 days and I’ve gotten pretty settled.  In that amount of time, I’ve burned/scalded a limited amount of food on my coil stove.  I’m taking THAT as a win!  I’ve also had maintenance to my apartment probably 5 times.  I’m not 100% sure the kitchen took quite this much of a beating before me, so pretty much all things in the kitchen that could malfunction did. Most exciting of which was the dishwasher!  A kitchen floor covered in bubbles is TONS OF FUN!!!  Anywho, Rico (the head maintenance guy) is my new best friend, and he’s THE MAN!!!  Got everything in excellent working order, and was hilarious to talk to while he was working.  Props to Rico!

Other than causing my kitchen to self-destruct, I’ve done a whole lot of nothing.  Ok, that’s not entirely true.  I’ve read about 5 books and worked on several crochet projects.  Oh, and drank some wine.  Ok, maybe a lot of wine.  I also found myself a new gym!  They are a really amazing group of people, and I can’t wait to make their community my own!

All that being said, I’ve been eating pretty strictly Paleo since I moved.  I’ve allowed myself a small amount of grass-fed cheese here and there, and a bit of dark chocolate, but essentially, I’m eating much MUCH cleaner than I was before I moved.  I’d fallen off the wagon pretty hard, but considering the stress of my life at that time, I didn’t really beat myself up about it.  Whatever.  I’m back on the wagon, and really feeling the benefits already!  I’m sleeping sounder, waking up with a clearer head, still dying in workouts (but I’m blaming that on the heat!), but generally just feeling more alive.  I LOVE that good food can do that to you!

Late last week, I was feeling a teeny bit sad that my family was 900 miles away.  I immediately started craving comfort food, so I whipped up this bad boy, and DANG!  It was SO GOOD!

stroganoff

This is my SUPER easy beef stroganoff!  I didn’t plan appropriately and didn’t make anything to serve it over, but it would be delicious over some spaghetti squash, on an open-face sweet potato, or over some white rice (if you are into that).  I would also probably double the recipe if you are cooking for more than 2 people.  Here it is!:

Stupid Easy Beef Stroganoff

  • 1 pound stew beef chunks (or steak cut into small chunks)
  • 1 medium onion, sliced
  • 3 cloves garlic, minced
  • 1 cup coconut milk (get the canned stuff)
  • 1/4 teaspoon dried dill
  • 1/2 teaspoon paprika (any variety will do)
  • salt and pepper to taste
  • 1 tablespoon tapioca flour
  1. In a deep skillet over medium high heat, heat 1-2 tablespoons of cooking oil (olive, coconut, etc.).  Add your onion and garlic and cook until translucent.  You want to let them go until they are just starting to brown, about 7 minutes or so.
  2. Add in your stew beef and sear until the beef is browned on all sides, another 5 minutes.
  3. When all the yummies are browned and delicious, add in your coconut milk and spices, NOT the tapioca flour!  Make sure you stir your coconut milk in well, being sure to scrape up any bits on the bottom of your pan. Reduce the heat to medium low and cover your pan.  Let it simmer for about 10 minutes, or until the beef is starting to tenderize and all flavors have come together.
  4. At this point, uncover your pan and taste for salt and pepper.
  5. In a small cup, mix together your 1 tablespoon of tapioca flour with 2 tablespoons of water.  Make sure you mix it until all clumps are gone.
  6. Pour this slurry into your beef and coconut milk mixture slowly, stirring while adding it.  You should notice it thickening up almost immediately. Allow your stroganoff to cook for about 2-3 more minutes over medium heat.
  7. Spoon it over your carb vehicle of choice and put it in your mouth!

This smacked the comfort food craving right out of my mouth!  Hope you enjoy it as much as I did!!!!  Until next time!

Peace, Love, and Paleo y’all

-Meister

Stepping off of Easy Street

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big ol booty

Warning: This is going to be largely a rant…however; some of this might resonate with others, so read if you want. Or ignore! It’s cool either way.

I’ve been all over the map mentally and emotionally lately. This is somewhat to be expected considering I’m on the brink of the biggest life change I’ve ever experienced. I just sold my house, accepted my offer for a Ph.D. program, moved back in with my parents, and have absolutely no idea where I will be living or what life will look like 4 months from now. All of that allows me to feel off overwhelmed, right?

Wrong. All of that allows me to feel a bit uncertain. But can we honestly ever say we know what life will look like a few months from right now? This moment. Right now. Is the only sure thing, and even that is in a constant state of flux based on the choices we make. I like to think I’m a rational intelligent person, but why is it that I find myself asking, “When are things going to be easy?”

This concept of the “easy road” has been one that has haunted me for quite some time. I find myself falling into the spiral of “If I only lost some weight, if I was only in a relationship, if I only had another degree, if I only had a less stressful job…..” THEN life would be easy. It would be carefree. Things would come naturally. I wouldn’t have to try so freaking hard.

At the bottom of that spiral is one simple truth: SCREW EASY.

Easy is safe, it’s tame. It’s never allowing ourselves to experience moments that bring us face to face with fear, pain, despair, and sheer emptiness and unknowing that allow us to truly change and break barriers. Human beings are warriors. We fight, we scream, we bleed, we cry, we cuss, we shut out those closest to us, we fail. But we learn.

So from the bottom of my current spiral:

Easy would be settling for the job I’m in. I’m jumping head first into the unknown of going back to school.

Easy would be staying in Omaha. I’m uprooting everything I’ve known for a new adventure.

Easy would be wasting my life counting calories and living on a treadmill. Instead, I’m showing up and giving whatever I have in me (which admittedly isn’t always much) at my CrossFit gym…and improving, slowly, no matter how tiny my baby steps seem. And I’m eating. Food. Lots and lots of REAL food.

Easy would be lowering my standards to simply “have a boyfriend”. I’m forging through on my own and respecting myself enough to know that I won’t settle in my relationships, and that I deserve better.

Be a fucking warrior. Rant over. Now go eat something!

Peace, Love, and Paleo.

Meister

Naughty Naughty Comfort Food Bliss

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meatball bake

How freaking delicious does that look?! I mean, how could I NOT lead with this picture?  This, my friends, is a meatball bake.  Yes indeed!  Hidden under all of that gloriousness are meatballs.  Who would’ve known?!

Paleo confession time: I crave traditional comfort foods all the time.  Seriously, ALL the time.  For me, these foods are usually something really starchy, smothered in a red sauce and baked, or anything covered in Gravy.  I’m German and Irish.  We are gravy loving, potato smashing folks.  I can’t deny my genetics, nor can I refuse these tasty, tasty foods. So I’ve tried desperately to find ways to satisfy these cravings….and since I’ve YET to find an epic gravy recipe that comes anywhere CLOSE to being Paleo, I usually go the smothered in red sauce route to feed my hungry soul.

Paleo Confession #2:  I eat cheese.  Sue me.  Most of the time I shoot for raw milk or grassfed cheeses, but sometimes I don’t. Don’t care.  If some cheese is going to bring me to an early death, bring it on!

So my friends, enjoy! And don’t judge me too harshly for the aforementioned confessions.

Meatball Bake

     For the meatballs:

  • 1.5 – 2 pounds ground beef
  • 8-10 fresh basil leaves, finely chopped
  • 4-5 cloves garlic, finely minced
  • 1/4 cup dried minced onion
  • 1 egg, beaten
  • 4 heaping tablespoons of almond flour (can sub coconut flour, but cut to 2 tbsp)
  • Spices to taste (salt, pepper, dried oregano)

     For the sauce topping:

  • 2 cans fire-roasted tomatoes
  • 1 can artichoke hearts, roughly chopped
  • Freshly torn basil
  • Grated cheese…..if that’s how you get down
  1. Preheat oven to 375 degrees.
  2. Combine all ingredients for meatballs in a large bowl and mix together thoroughly.  Get in there all down and dirty like with your hands and get after it.
  3. Roll into balls (I made mine bigger than walnut-sized) and place in a deep baking dish.  You should be able to get around 16-20 meatballs out of the mixture.
  4. Bake meatballs uncovered for 25 minutes, or until they are browned on the outside.
  5. Remove from the oven and top with your chopped up artichoke hearts.
  6. Then layer on your two cans of fire-roasted tomatoes over the top.
  7. Put your dish back in the oven and bake for another 30 minutes.
  8. When your sauce is bubbling like crazy and starting to brown around the edges, remove from oven.
  9. Top with your fresh torn basil and grated cheese and pop it back in the oven for 5 more minutes to melt.
  10. SMASH ON COMFORT FOOD GOODNESS!……after you’ve let it cool down first of course.  It will come out hotter than the surface of the sun, and you don’t want to turn your mouth to lava.  Safety first, friends. Safety first.

There it is peeps.  Get after it!  Fill your bellies with simple goodness.  Make it happen.  And live it up with your naughty paleo selves. 🙂

Peace, Love, and Paleo.

Meister

Guess who’s back????

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Well hey there long lost friends!  Clearly, I’ve been away for a bit.  Ok, who am I kidding?  I fell off the face of the Earth for a few months.  In reality, things have been pretty hectic….and while they haven’t at ALL calmed down, they seem to be settling into some sort of twisted sense of normal for me.

That, coupled with a particularly nasty case of academic writer’s block, brings be back to you!  What should I really be doing right now?  Writing my admissions essays…but NO! I made a tragically stupid mistake by looking at the degree plan of study (in depth) that I’m applying for and subsequently am having a mini-panic attack.  Joy. However, my somewhat flaky nature and ability to be scared by a PDF is GREAT for you guys….because I’m back!  If for no other reason that to prove to myself that I can still write.

If it gets rambly, my most sincere apologies.  I am just navigating through the storm of not actually having written anything for months.  Sue me.

I’m gonna do what I do best!  Serve up a healthy dose of snark and a bangin’ recipe!  With that, I give you these beauties….
bison meatballs

These little bad boys are some CRAZY delicious bison meatballs!  Now, if you are finding yourself saying, “EEEWW!  Bison!?!”  just freaking take my word for it, bison is AMAZING!  Like, life-changing amazing.  In fact, I don’t know why I didn’t get on the bison train sooner!  Now, if you can’t find bison, these could be made with ground beef….I suppose.  But if you CAN find bison (or happen to have an old friend from elementary school who was gifted a bison ranch as a wedding gift…..I mean, it could happen!) load up on as much of that stuff as you can!

Bison Meatballs

  • 2 pounds ground bison
  • 2-3 cloves of garlic, finely minced
  • 2-3 small red chile peppers, finely minced seeds and all! (you could sub 1-2 teaspoons of crushed red pepper depending on the heat level you want)
  • 2 teaspoon onion powder
  • 2 teaspoon garlic powder
  • 1/2 teaspoon ground sage
  • 1 teaspoon dried thyme
  • 2 teaspoons salt
  • Ground Black pepper….as much as you dig!
  1. Combine all ingredients in a large bowl and mix by hand.
  2. Get good and dirty making sure all spices are incorporated thoroughly!
  3. Roll mixture into walnut-sized balls.  Mine made just over 2 dozen meatballs.
  4. Heat 1-2 tablespoons in a deep skillet and add meatballs to your pan.
  5. Brown on all sides, about 2-3 minutes per side until you get a nice brown crust on each side.
  6. When meatballs are browned on all sides, I topped mine with my favorite red sauce and simmered them somewhat covered (more to protect my cooktop from splatters) on low for about 10 minutes.
  7. Toss those bad boys on some spaghetti squash and enjoy!

I hope that these are rockin’ for ya!  They were pretty much one of the best things I’ve ever made….but I’m a sucker for simple comfort foods.

Here’s to being back! Peace, Love, and Paleo!

Meister

Soaking up the Summer! Roadtrips, Snack Food, and Insecurities!

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Ok, so I know over and over again I have apologized at length about neglecting this bad boy.  Well, I’m done apologizing.  I realize I’ve taken quite the break from posting on here, but I’ve been very UNapologetically enjoying my summer and living life to the fullest!  I’m taking advantage of the precious few days/weeks that I have left before I go back to school and there’s nothing to feel sorry about in that!  If that irks you, meh, get over it!

As I sit here typing, I am waiting anxiously for morning to come so that I can embark on my roadtrip to Texas!  Some may think that it’s absolutely ludicrous to spend multiple hours in the car alone….I CAN’T FREAKING WAIT!  Sometimes it’s all dark and stormy for me to be alone in my own head on the open road, but I am in desperate need of this time to sort some stuff out!  Admittedly, I am really pretty apprehensive about being out of my own kitchen and my gym for almost two weeks.  But what the hell.  Life is about embracing the fear and giving it hell, right?  That’s what I’m telling myself at least!  Plus, I prepped some snacks for the road and packed ALL of my workout clothes as well as my jump rope and a kettle bell.  So really, I see that as preparing myself for success!

Before I get to food, I just need to say that my 10 year high school reunion was last weekend.  It was about as good as I expected it would be.  The hardest part of it for me was that I was THAT girl.  You know, the one that a ton of people had to second guess as to who it was.  I posted this picture on facebook on the morning of my reunion:

10 year change

The left side was taken on the morning of my high school graduation in May 2003 and the pic on the right was taken the morning of my 10 year reunion (July 2013).  It kind of set me back a bit looking at the comparison.  First, I guess I hadn’t realized I was that big by the end of high school, and secondly, I realized that I actually got quite a bit bigger before I started losing weight.  Anyway, this comparison photo was shared among several people and I got a ton of really positive comments on it.  Many of them somehow involving the word “inspiration”.  I have to admit that that particular word makes me really awkward.  I want my various passions to inspire people.  I want to inspire my students and those around me to continue their own education on whatever topics fascinate them.  I want my actions, purpose, and interactions with others to inspire those around to treat people better.  Yeah, I lost weight….a LOT of it.  And yes, I have done a complete 180 with my life, my choices, my social circles, my desires, and my needs.  To say that I’m humbled by people calling me an inspiration would be inadequate.  I don’t know, I’m probably just insecure.

Ok enough head case ranting.  I made some BOMB Banana Bread Granola for my trip tomorrow! Not gonna lie, the cooking time is gonna be a bit sketchy because my power went out towards the end of baking….so you might have to play around with the timing.  But the flavor is OUT OF CONTROL!! I swear, it tastes just like banana bread.

banana bread granola

Banana Bread Granola

  • 1.5 cups mixed nuts of choice, roughly chopped (I used pecans and cashews…it’s what I had on hand!)
  • 10-12 dates, pitted and roughly chopped
  • 1/2 cup shredded unsweetened coconut
  • 2 smallish very ripe bananas (I’m talking brown and spotty on the peel….that means they are SUPER sweet!)
  • 1/3 cup coconut oil, melted
  • 2 tablespoons maple syrup
  • 1 teaspoon vanilla
  • 2 teaspoons cinnamon
  • 1/2 teaspoon salt
  1. Heat up your oven to 325 degrees
  2. In a large bowl, mash bananas with a fork until they are almost pureed smooth.
  3. Add in your melted coconut oil, vanilla, cinnamon, maple syrup, and salt. Mix well to combine.
  4. Stir in your nuts, coconut, and dates….making sure you coat all dry ingredients well.  The dates will probably clump up together, just try to break them up as much as possible.
  5. Line a large baking sheet with parchment paper and spread out your granola mixture onto the baking sheet.  Make sure it is in an even layer, and spread pretty thinly., no more than 1/4 inch thick.
  6. Bake for 40 ish minutes, stirring the mixture halfway through.  You want to bake until the granola starts to brown a bit and has dried out some.
  7. Remove from the oven and LET IT COOL!!  It is the cooling that makes it all “crispy” and granola like!  Due to the “wet” nature of this mix, it may never crisp up completely.  But I found that I really kind of like the chewy texture of mine!
  8. Once it has cooled completely, I stored mine in an airtight container in the fridge.

Such a sweet and delicious paleo treat!  Can’t wait to smash on this in the car!!!  With that, realize it may be a bit until I post another full out entry, BUT be sure to follow me on FaceBook and I will be sure to post tasty food pics of what I’m smashing on during my travels! And while you’re at it, check yourself….be an inspiration for someone.  Do it! Peace, Love, and Paleo!

-Meister

Baking Queen

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baking supplies

Hey friends!  So it’s been a crazy past few days!  Last week was full of prepping for my annual Luau at my house.  The party ended up being a giant success!  Lots of awesome people in attendance and TONS of great food!  I love hanging out with the folks from my gym, they are a stellar crew.  Pretty sure I drank my body weight in hard cider, but who cares!  It’s summer.  Live it up, I say!

This week is ALL about baking.  I’ve been prepping all week for The Duo competition on Saturday.  Because I’m going to have a booth set up, I’ve been doing LITERALLY nothing but baking every afternoon, evening, and night this week.  I’m kind of over it!  In my fridge right now are four pans of Maple Bacon Blondies, four pans of Chocolate Hazelnut Brownies, about 10 dozen Oreo Balls waiting to be dipped in chocolate, and enough Chocolate Chunk cookie dough for about 15 dozen cookies.

I can’t wait for Saturday to be here so that I can stock my fridge with REAL food again and get back into a regular eating schedule instead of eating random protein that is hiding in the back of my fridge.  So because of all of the baking, I have no recipe for you.  I suck at life.  I know.  My bad.  Again, it’s summer. Meh!  Make some desserts that I’ve linked up top.  If you haven’t tried them out before, get on it now!  OR better yet! Show up on Saturday and just buy the treats I’ve already made!  Do it.  It’s a Win-Win!

Well that’s all I’ve got for right now!  If you don’t hear from me for a few days, there’s a really good chance I’m in a sugar coma.  Somebody bring me a steak and some veggies…..

Until then, Peace, Love, and Paleo!

-Meister

Sweet Baby Jesus, Garlic Dill Mayo!

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dill mayo

I’m not even lying when I tell you that this mayo is SO beyond insane that I stood in my kitchen finding reasons to put it on things so I could lick the spoon.  I mean really, who the hell stands around eating mayo!?!?  Apparently I do, and it’s because this stuff is FREAKING delicious!  Like completely out of control and life changing.  LIFE CHANGING FOLKS!

Honestly, I wasn’t planning on blogging tonight.  I was going to cook a simple dinner, take it easy, and just call it a relaxing night.  And then that damned mayo happened…..and I feel guilty NOT sharing it with you guys.

With that being said, there are a couple of tricks to making paleo mayo.  It can be quite finnicky, but if you just find some patience it’s really pretty easy.  Minimal ingredients, a little bit of time, a LOT of calm and love in your heart, and you have magical mayo at the end! Plus, it makes a good amount!  I can’t wait to use this to make crazy good salads!  I’m thinking some sort of sweet potato salad….probably with bacon.  OOOOOH!  Or a BLT chicken salad!  Yep, that’s happening.  Stay tuned for that one, it’s gonna be good.  I can tell already! See! So much joy, from just a little jar of mayo 🙂

Garlic Dill Mayo

  • 2 egg yolks (save the whites for breakfast!)
  • 1 lemon, juiced (you want about 2-3 tablespoons of fresh lemon juice)
  • 1 cup Extra Light Tasting Olive Oil, seriously, DON’T use regular Extra Virgin, it won’t come together correctly……you could play around with other oils here as well or combinations, but you are going to want it to be a majority of oil that will stay in a liquid state (AKA NOT all coconut oil)
  • 2 tablespoons fresh dill (or 1 tablespoon dried dill)
  • 1/2 teaspoon garlic powder
  • 1/2 teaspoon onion powder
  • 1/2 teaspoon salt

***My directions below are using a food processor.  You COULD whisk by hand or with a hand mixer, or hell, you could even use a blender, but ain’t nobody got time for that!  Let the food processor do all the work!***

  1. In the bowl of your food processor add your egg yolks and the juice from half of your lemon. Pulse it a couple of times to combine.
  2. Set the processor on the lowest setting.  While it is mixing, SLOWLY add in your oil.  Seriously, I’m talking a few drops at a time for probably the first 1/4 cup of oil added.  It WILL take time and patience!!!  Just keep the processor running!  When you have created a emulsion, the mixture will start to thicken and turn opaque.  At this point, you can begin to add in your oil a bit more at a time.  I will warn you, err on the side of adding oil VERY slowly! Once you break the emulsion by adding it too quickly, you are screwed and the mayo is trash!
  3. Once all of the oil has been incorporated (it took me upwards of about 7 minutes to get all of it added) you can stop the processor.  You should have a thick and AWESOME looking mayo!!  Yay! You did it!
  4. At this point, scrape down the sides of the bowl and add in the remaining lemon juice as well as the dill and the spices.  Pulse it a few times to mix everything into the mayo.
  5. Taste!!!  Adjust seasoning as needed, just be prepared to want to eat mayo straight off the spoon.  Welcome to being a weirdo!  Sorry to have sealed this fate for you…
  6. Store it in closed container in the fridge.  It keeps as long as eggs normally would, but seriously, I’d be surprised if mine makes it a full week in my fridge!

The uses for this are totally endless.  Like I said earlier, I’m hoping to bring you an epic mayonnaise based salad here sometime soon.  That just sounds SO FREAKING good right now, not to mention, it kind of screams summer! If all else fails, just smear some of this on top of some grilled or broiled salmon and you will be a happy little camper!  See!!

dill mayo salmon

Peace, Love, and Paleo Mayo!

-Meister

Now Introducing….the WORST blogger ever!!

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Seriously friends.  I’m a giant jerk.  I haven’t posted in almost a month.  To be fair, a WHOLE lot of big stuff has happened in the past three weeks.  For starters, I had my birthday!  Yay.  I’m officially 28, so I guess that’s exciting?  Also, school ended for the year, which is always a chaotic time. So let’s do a little review in pics of what I’ve been doing that has kept me away from all of you lovely folks.  Ready? Go! I’ve been….clean bruises

Beating the crap out of myself at the gym everyday!  Honestly, it’s crazy how easily I bruise.

wildcat 5k 2013

Hey look!  I ran a 5k at my school!  Plus, I didn’t die AND I took 12 minutes off of my previous 5k….that means I finished in just under 33 minutes.  I’ll TAKE it!

road trip selfie

I headed down to Kansas City for a brief getaway.  It was GREAT!  Love that city and I LOVE road tripping!  Speaking of, stay tuned for plenty of talk about my “Tour of Texas” I’m doing in July!

Lastly, and possibly the most important thing I’ve been doing….

yard drinking

Enjoying the HELL out of my summer break!  For real. I’ve been enjoying deck beverages, yard beverages, patio beverages, beverages with friends, with family, and by myself!  It’s been amazing to JUST RELAX…..which I don’t allow myself to do much.  I’m pretty sure I could get used to this!

As you can see, I’ve been a busy busy girl!  I know I’ve said it before, but I am going to post more often.  I promise.  No, I really REALLY promise!  Anyways, regardless of all of the awesome going on lately, there have been a few things kind of bringing me down.  One of these is body image.  I am convinced that I will always struggle with it.  Always, no matter how old I get, no matter how confident I become, it’s always lurking….waiting to pounce at one moment of weakness.  That’s all a different post for a different day….but be prepared, because I feel like it’s going to be coming soon!

On to food.  To be quite honest, I haven’t really been cooking much exciting stuff lately.  Just sticking to the basics of a piece of grilled/roasted meat, some veggies, and some fat.  Pretty boring folks!  But the one thing I have been mildly obsessed with is stuffing sweet potatoes.  It’s SO FREAKING GOOD!  Not to mention super simple!  So I’ll give ya a two-fer on recipes tonight.  I owe you…….big time.  So here are two of my beauties!

pulled chicken sweet potato jalapeno beef sweet potato

Garlic Jalapeno Pulled Chicken

  • 3-4 whole jalapeno peppers, cut in half lengthwise (leave all seeds and ribs IN)
  • 4 garlic cloves, peeled and smashed (just whack them with the back of your knife)
  • 2 tablespoons dried minced onion (you could use fresh onion chunks, I just didn’t have any in the house!)
  • 1 teaspoon cumin
  • 1 tablespoon salt
  • 1 pound of chicken (I used chicken tenders….they cook faster, but you could sub breasts or thighs….the cooking time might be a bit different)
  1. In a large dutch oven or stock pot, fill with 4-6 cups of water.
  2. Put ALL ingredients OTHER THAN the chicken into the pot and bring to a boil.
  3. When the water is at a rolling boil, carefully drop your chicken in. Turn the heat back to Medium and continue to boil for about 30 minutes.
  4. To test if chicken is done, simply remove a piece of chicken and split it apart at the thickest part. If it’s not done, just toss it back into the cauldron!
  5. When chicken is cooked through, remove from the pot and allow to cool before shredding by hand.

This turned out slightly spicy and totally delicious!  Not to mention, it can be used for any number of other recipes.  In fact, I scrambled some of the leftover chicken into my eggs the next morning!  Boom.  Plus, it was damn good stuffed into a baked sweet potato and topped with fresh guacamole.

Jalapeno Lime Ground Beef

  • 1 pound ground beef
  • 1-2 jalapeno peppers, seeds and ribs removed, finely diced
  • 4 limes, juiced
  • 1 tablespoon dried minced onion (could sub fresh…about 1/2 an onion, just didn’t have any!)
  • 1 teaspoon cumin
  • 1 teaspoon chili powder
  • 1/2 teaspoon garlic powder
  • Salt and Pepper, to taste
  1. In a deep skillet, brown your ground beef.
  2. When beef is almost cooked through add in the remaining ingredients and mix together well.
  3. Turn your heat back to Medium-Low and simmer your ground beef for 8-10 minutes until most of the liquid has evaporated.
  4. Taste, and salt and pepper as needed!
  5. Stuff it in a baked sweet potato and SMASH!

Alrighty, well hopefully I’ve gone and made a bit of amends……I promise not to desert you again! Plus, there will probably be a dessert of some sort coming soon.  I will be selling baked goods at a competition being held at my gym on June 29th, so I will be a baking MACHINE in the next couple of weeks!  Lucky you 🙂 Get out there and enjoy your summer! Peace, Love, and Paleo!

-Meister

Birthdays and Bacon

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Oddly enough, the two go completely hand in hand!  I’m sitting here, writing to you all on the eve of my 28th birthday.  I remember a time when I thought, “Damn! 28 is SO OLD!”  Ha.  Right.  Don’t get me wrong, I still don’t know how I feel about getting closer to 30, but I feel awesome about my age.  That being said, I feel like 27 is going to be a very hard year to beat.  I discovered CrossFit, went fully Paleo, and began reclaiming my life as my own while I was 27.  I traveled, I met TONS of amazing people, I launched a blog, and I have tried my hand at selling my Paleo baked goods.  For real, 27 was pretty stellar.  So, BRING IT 28! You had better be freaking awesome, because you have some major expectations to rise up to!

On to bacon.  I can’t express enough how much I love bacon.  Hell, I have a bacon figurine that sits on my desk at school that I refer to as my “boyfriend”.  Several of my students have commented that they are bringing me bacon tomorrow as birthday gifts.  That is just weird to me….and unless it is in an unopened package, will NOT be consumed by me.  I ain’t dumb.  I love em, but I don’t trust middle schoolers with food handling or prep of ANY kind and I don’t really want to spend my birthday in the bathroom.

Couple of exciting things are going down!  The first is that I will be selling my Paleo treats at CrossFit Artis during “The Duo” event on June 29th.  Check out their page for info!  It’s going to be an AWESOME day!  Not to mention, I’ll be there, slinging treats.  What can beat that?!? Nothing.  That’s what. Not a damn thing.

Secondly, I recently bought what I like to call “almost booty shorts”.  This is HUGE for me.  I can’t even begin to describe how huge this is….I mean, I spent the better part of my life HATING my body, especially my thighs.  Let’s face it. They pretty much dominate my legs.  Anywho, I’ve apparently begun to embrace them OR I’ve quit caring what people think, because after the one ridiculously hot day this past week, I put my foot down and went out and bought some shorts!  No more WODing in capris.  It’s too freaking hot! So yeah, if you happen to be around the gym and you catch me in spandex, deal with it.  I have, and they are kind of making me feel awesome…..so if you rain on that for me, I might have to punch you square in the face! 🙂

Back to bacon.  I made this bacon egg scramble tonight to eat for breakfasts for the remainder of the week, and it was SO GOOD!  Plus, it was stupid easy to make.  I know the picture kind of sucks, but trust me, get after it!

bacon egg scramble

Bacon Breakfast Scramble

  • 8 strips bacon, diced
  • 6 eggs, lightly beaten
  • 2 bell peppers of choice (I used a little red, orange, and yellow) diced
  • 1 small onion, diced
  • 2 cloves garlic, minced
  • 1 tablespoon hot sauce (I used Frank’s Red Hot)
  • Salt and Pepper to taste
  1. In a deep skillet, cook up your bacon pieces.  The time will vary based on the thickness of your bacon, heat of the pan, etc.  Just be careful not to burn your bacon.  That’s a most tragic event.
  2. When your bacon is crisp, remove it from the skillet, leaving the bacon fat behind in the pan. Place it on a paper towel to drain some of the grease off.
  3. Add your peppers, onions, and garlic to your skillet.  Saute the veggies in the bacon fat for 5-7 minutes over medium high heat, or until they become translucent and begin to soften.
  4. When you veggies are cooked through, add back in your bacon. Cook together for a couple of minutes.
  5. Lastly, add in your scrambled eggs and your hot sauce.  Scramble the eggs into the mixture, keeping it moving around your pan so it doesn’t burn.
  6. When your eggs have cooked through, (3-5 minutes later) taste it for salt and pepper.  Season to your liking and serve!

I am planning on topping mine with some fresh avocado and smashing on breakfast like a CHAMP!  This is going to be a birthday breakfast of champions!  Enjoy your bacon, your thighs, and your birthday! Because I’m going to enjoy the HELL out of mine! Peace, Love, and Paleo.

-Meister